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Writer's pictureEmily Craig

I Still Need You

Dear Nanny,


Yesterday was terrible. It had its good moments, but overall it was a bad day. I realized at the end of it the reason I couldn't shake my bad mood. I realized that on my bad days I always had the option to go to you in some way either by phone or in person. Not that this is the first day since you passed, but this was the worse one since you left this world. This day was worse than I could have even planned in my author's brain. One terrible thing after another like it was straight from the Devil's mind.


I couldn't catch a break. It was a Monday.


I woke up late.

Someone almost changed lanes on top of me.

Late for work / no breakfast.

Running on empty.

Not knowing solid riding plans for dinner.

Finally knowing and it is annoying.

Yelling match with the boyfriend... :\

Car stalls out. Call Momma. Man tries to help me, kindly turn him away.

My car won't stay on. Call a tow truck.

Ride home with my sister. Wait to leave for dinner.

6-deep in brother-in-law's truck, not too bad, but tight and no A/C.

Tired. Dragging. More yelling matches with everyone before bed.


In the shower, I realized I needed you. I needed my Nanny. As PawPaw kept teasing me after dinner that he was going to talk to you about me, I should have realized it then, but it didn't hit me until I was alone. I just really needed you. I needed our ranting time. I miss you.


I'm going to be okay. We are all. I promise between me and you, we will keep PawPaw straight and doing okay. I'll keep bugging him, too, because you know I love to.


I love you.


Until Next Time,


Em

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